The Quest

I recently came across the following poem by Eliza Scudder. I was deeply moved by the honest struggle of doubt, yet hope in God that I read within her words. After reading the poem, I researched this author and found that Eliza was a woman who for one reason or another wrestled with the companions of restlessness and doubt along her journey. Her words, in many ways, resonated with my own journey toward trust and rest in the Savior, reminding me that I am not the first to struggle and I can not lose the One who holds me in His hand.

The Quest

By: Eliza Scudder 1821-1896

I cannot find You! Still on restless pinion
     My spirit beats the void where You do dwell;
I wander lost through all your vast domain,
     And shrink before Your light ineffable.
I cannot find You! E’en when most adoring
     Before You, I bend in lowliest prayer;
Beyond these bounds of thought my thought upsoaring,
     From farthest quest comes back: You are not there!
Yet high above the limits of my seeing,
     And folded in the inmost heart so far,
So deep, below the deeps of conscious being,
     Your splendor shines, and there, O God, You are!
I cannot lose You! Still in You abiding,
     The end is clear, how wide so’er I roam
The law that holds the worlds my steps is guiding,
     And I must rest at last in You, my home.